New Year, Same Tears
by The Alice Killer - Storm
Summary: It's Dia's birthday, but it's not going very well


"Hey! Finally! Everyone made it!" A certain hyper as always orange-haired girl said.

"Jeez, Chika. It took only ten minutes for us all to get in here. You're making it seem like it took hours." Riko sighed.

"But it felt like it." Chika protested.

"You say were all here, but we're missing someone." Yoshiko pointed out.

"Huh? Oh... yeah, where is Dia, Ruby?" Chika asked.

"I think she's in her room." Ruby replied.

"I'm gonna go get her." Mari declared.

"Wait for me! I'm not trusting you alone!" Kanan ran after her.

"Is there a reason Dia's in her room instead of out here?" Riko asked.

Ruby shrugged, "I don't know. She didn't say anything to me."

"You know Dia doesn't like loud, crowded places. She's probably hiding up there so she doesn't have to face that." Yō pointed out.

"That's true... well, let's see what Kanan and Mari say when they get back. Why don't we get some food?"

"Sounds good to me!"

Mari was standing outside Dia's room. Kanan was right behind her. Mari knocked on the door and announced that she and Kanan were outside. She didn't receive a response.

"Dia, we're coming in." Mari said as she opened the door.

They both entered the room. They only made it a few steps before they stopped. Kanan quietly closed the door.

Dia was in her room. She was curled up on her bed, her back facing Kanan and Mari. It was too loud to really hear anything, but it was obvious what was going on.

Dia was shaking as she clutched a pillow to her head. Kanan and Mari looked at each other. They knew what was going on. Dia was having a panic attack.

Mari quickly made her way over to Dia. She gently removed the pillow and forced Dia to face her. Dia grabbed Mari's shirt tightly and sobbed into it. Mari held Dia in a tight hug.

"Come on, why don't we go outside where it's quieter?" Kanan suggested.

Dia shakily nodded. She let go of Mari. The tears were still falling down her face. Kanan pulled Dia off the bed and close to her. Dia buried her face into Kanan's side. Kanan and Mari slowly guided Dia outside. They went through the backdoor because it was the least crowded way to go.

They did their best to make sure no one saw what was going on. They didn't need anyone knowing about this. Dia always was seen as someone strong. If people found out otherwise, it wouldn't do her any good.

They made it outside. Kanan led Dia to a bench a little ways down the street. The three of them sat down on it. Dia finally removed herself from Kanan. She wiped away the few tears still staining her face.

"Are you okay?" Kanan asked.

Dia nodded. She didn't say anything. She was trying to calm her beating heart. It was still pounding in her chest.

"What happened? You've never had that problem before like that. Normally you're fine in your room." Mari asked.

"I... I was... but then it just... it kept getting louder... I couldn't do it..."

"It's okay..." Kanan soothed, "We can stay out here for as long as you need."

"What time is it?" Dia asked.

"Almost midnight." Mari replied, "We've got ten more minutes."

"Can we... can we stay out here? Until everyone leaves?" Dia asked, her voice starting to shake more with every word she said.

"Of course. We can stay out here as long as we need to. Just tell us whenever you're ready to go inside." Mari replied as she smiled at Dia.

The three girls sat in silence. They didn't need to say anything. Being together was enough for them. Mari's phone started blowing up with texts as the other members asked where they were at.

"Dia~ everyone wants to see you. Should I invite them out here?" Mari asked as she gently poked Dia on the cheek.

Dia thought about it, "No. I... I think I want go inside."

"You sure? It's not midnight yet. It's going to be crowded still." Kanan asked.

Dia nodded, "I'm ready."

"Alright then. Let's head back inside." The three of them stood up. Mari texted back that they were coming to them.

The three of them made their way back to the house. Kanan and Mari kept looking at each other. They were worried. They didn't think that Dia was going to do very well in the crowd.

They entered the house. Mari led the way to find where the others were at. They were off to the side in the living room. They were all happy to see Dia. Dia was occasionally twitching. The noise was hurting her ears. She was trying her best to act like nothing was wrong. Only Kanan, Mari, and Ruby knew the extent of how bad she could get. She didn't need the rest of Aqours knowing and worrying about her as well.

"I can't wait till it's midnight!" Chika exclaimed.

"For what reason?" Yō teased.

"For..."

The conversation faded out. Dia couldn't focus on anything. Her heart was pounding so loudly she felt the others could hear it. She could see everyone talking, but her mind wouldn't process a damn thing. She was shutting down. The noise was too much. Dia regretted coming back. She knew very well she couldn't handle this, but she wanted to try to do it. To try and show everyone she was strong.

Dia was trying not to breathe very heavily. She didn't want anyone to catch on to her discomfort. They all looked so happy. She didn't want to ruin that for them. She wanted them to have fun.

The time seemed to be crawling by. Dia just prayed it would end, but it felt like an eternity. She kept glancing at the clock. It felt like it hadn't moved at all. Dia was growing worse by the second.

She took a shaky breath. She could do this. She just needed to focus on something else. She was going to be fine.

Dia kept repeating those things. She needed to stay strong. She didn't want anyone else to know how weak she was right now.

Then suddenly, she collapsed. Dia's legs gave out and she fell forward. Thankfully, Riko was right in front of her so she didn't hit the ground. Riko yelped and turned around. Dia had sunk to the ground, unable to keep standing. She was clutching her hair as she started crying.

Instantly, Kanan had her in a hug. Everyone was glancing at each other in concern. Ruby had knelt down beside Kanan and was speaking softly to Dia. Mari was trying to keep the others calm. Everyone was worried about her.

"Come on, Dia... let's go to your room." Kanan picked Dia up.

Ruby went after her. Mari held the others back. They didn't need everyone swarming Dia while she was fragile like that.

"Mari? What happened to Dia?" Chika asked, her eyes filled with worry.

Mari sighed, "Dia... has problems with... noise..."

"They're really bad, huh?" Riko frowned.

Mari nodded, "Yeah. It's been this way since we've known her. She ends up like that if there's a lot of noise. I don't know why she wanted to come and stay here."

"To prove she was able to?" Yō suggested, "She always has been the cool and strong girl. Maybe she just... thought she could do it and... prove she was strong like everyone believed."

"She's an idiot!" Mari cursed, "She should know her own fucking comfort level!"

"Calm down, Mari..." Chika pleaded, "Don't draw attention."

Mari took a deep breath, "Sorry... I'm just worried... it's been a while since I've seen her get that bad."

"It's okay. It's pretty stressful for all of us." Hanamaru said.

"Why don't you go and see how she's doing?" Chika nudged Mari toward the stairs.

Mari stiffly walked toward the stairs. She looked back at the others. They nodded to her. They knew she should be with Dia.

Mari headed to Dia's room. As she stood outside, she listened for any noise. She didn't hear any. Mari opened the door and walked in. Her eyes landed on Dia first.

Dia was asleep, gripping Kanan tightly. Her head was buried into Kanan's chest. Her hands were holding Kanan's shirt just above her stomach. Mari closed the door and walked over to them. Ruby was sitting beside Kanan. She was looking at Dia.

"How is she?" Mari quietly asked.

"Not good." Kanan replied, "I... I just... this is our fault... isn't it?"

"Maybe it is..." Mari agreed as she hung her head.

They both knew Dia wouldn't last. They should've kept her away. But, they didn't. They let her get hurt instead. Both of them felt horrible. They had hurt Dia. That was something they never wanted to do.

"It's midnight..." Ruby whispered.

"This wasn't a very good way to start off her birthday, was it?" Mari frowned.

"No... so, we'll have to make her day extra special when she wakes up." Kanan replied.

"I think she'll just want quiet." Ruby said, "I can't imagine she'd want anything to happen."

"True. So, maybe we could just have a quiet party for her." Kanan suggested.

"Yeah. Let's do that." Mari nodded.

"You wanna tell everyone what's going on?" Ruby asked Mari.

"I'm just gonna text them to come up. They'll stay quiet." Mari replied.

Within a few minutes, everyone was gathered in the room. They all stood quietly. The noise from the others in the house faded. They were all alone now.

"Everyone can get some rest." Kanan said, "I think she's going to sleep for a while."

"Should we do anything?" Chika asked.

"No. Just keep things calm when she wakes up." Kanan replied.

"Okay." Everyone agreed.

They all went to different places to sleep for the night. Kanan and Mari stayed in the room with Dia. They sent Ruby to bed with the others. They wanted her to get some rest. They weren't certain if Dia might wake up early and have any issues.

Kanan did her best to move over so Mari could join them on the bed. She didn't want to wake Dia if she could help it. Thankfully, Dia didn't wake up as she was jostled around.

The three of them slept. It was around five that Dia woke up. She removed herself from Kanan and looked around. Dia moved off of Kanan and onto the bed. She stared at Mari and Kanan. Dia felt like crying again. She had ruined it. She had let everyone see her like that.

Dia let out a sob. She was trying to hold back. She didn't want to cry anymore. She didn't want to wake them up. Unfortunately for her, she did wake them up.

Mari wrapped her arms around Dia and pulled her into a hug. Dia started crying more as she clung to Mari. Kanan nuzzled her face into Dia's hair.

"Shh... you're okay... it's okay..." Mari whispered.

"I-I'm sorry... I shouldn't have... shouldn't have stayed there..."

"It's okay, Dia... calm down..." Kanan tried to soothe her.

"B-but..."

"Shh..." Mari shushed her, "You don't need to talk."

Dia sniffled. She tried to wipe away her tears. Mari kissed her on the head. Kanan was brushing Dia's hair. It took them a while, but eventually they calmed her down.

"Dia, you don't need to apologize for anything. This wasn't your fault. If anything, we're to blame." Kanan whispered.

Dia didn't reply. She just stared at Mari's chest to try and avoid looking at them. Mari pulled Dia closer. Kanan joined in and hugged her from behind.

"Dia?"

Dia hummed slightly to let them know she heard.

"Happy birthday. Even if it didn't start out well, we're gonna make sure today is the best day ever for you." Mari chuckled.

"H-how?" Dia nervously asked.

"By having a very calm birthday for you. There isn't gonna be a lot of noise. We'll be quieter to help you recover." Kanan replied, "Does that sound good?"

Dia nodded. She was happy they were going to change things up for her. Normally they wanted a big party. They knew that wouldn't work. Not with Dia's current state.

"Everyone slept over. We'll start off having a nice breakfast."

"What time?" Dia mumbled as she yawned.

"I think eight sounds good." Mari said.

"Okay..." Dia mumbled.

"Get some more rest. We have time until then." Kanan said.

The three of them snuggled back together. It didn't take too long for them to fall asleep. When they woke, they'd make breakfast and then decide what else they'd want to do.


End file.
